• graymess@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    Associating the concepts of “tops” and “bottoms” to gay couples having sex is at least kind of ignorant if not homophobic.

    • Malfeasant@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      Getting bent over and fucked from behind isn’t exclusive to homosexual men… And regardless, nobody is saying that’s bad, if you’re into it, go crazy. Most people get the hint that the picture represents unwanted sex, which I hope we can agree is bad regardless of your orientation.

      • graymess@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        It is literally the meaning behind the meme. There’s a silhouette of two men labeled “you” and “Microsoft” with the Microsoft man depicted as the top, the one doing the fucking, the one in the stereotypical position of power in the act. The message is, “Microsoft fucks you like this man fucks this other man in the ass.” I don’t have to spell this out, it’s what’s in the picture.

        • TrickDacy@lemmy.world
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          8 months ago

          So if one has boobs would it be hateful toward straight people? It’s actually just as simple as using the word “fucking” as a verb to imply hurting or taking advantage of another person. It was then made into graphical format. This requires a leap to see anything in it besides that.

          Do you get mad every time you hear “you fucked me!”?

          Other than someone being a whiner about the word fuck, I’ve never ever heard of this being stretched into some sort of bigotry. Because it absolutely isn’t.

          • graymess@lemmy.world
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            8 months ago

            Yeah, it’s all from the same origin. The implication being that the one penetrating is “the man” and the one being penetrated is “the woman.” The other part of the implication being to fuck someone is good and powerful and dominating and being fucked is bad and immaculating and submissive.

            If that sounds like I’m adding my own words and meaning to a simple phrase, think about what is actually being said when you say “you’re getting fucked by Microsoft.” What, you don’t want to get fucked? Why? Sex is supposed to be a positive thing two people can do together. Unless the one “getting fucked” doesn’t want to and now we’re not talking about fucking, we’re talking about using violent rape as an analogy for what a software company is doing to its userbase and that’s just…kind of fucked up. I shouldn’t have to explain why, right?

            Anyway, no, I don’t get mad whenever I hear a phrase that stems from heteronormative ideas of sex. I don’t assume the person saying it is homophobic or an idiot, they probably just don’t know. But a friend once educated me on the subject, I thought about it, and I agree. So now I avoid using phrases like that, and when someone openly questions it like you have, cool, I’ll stop and talk about it.

            • Kevin@lemmy.worldM
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              8 months ago

              Maybe there’s something that I’m still missing, but the genders could be any which way and it would still give the same meaning: fucking or screwing someone over. It’s vulgar and tasteless but I don’t think it is necessarily homophobic or misogynistic.

              It does simply imply someone is being (sexually) dominated by another, but there’s no placement of “good” or “bad”—just that Microsoft users are being dominated by Microsoft, which is roughly true. I do think it’s a crude analogy and a terrible meme, but to say it’s anything more seems like a stretch.

            • TrickDacy@lemmy.world
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              8 months ago

              So, here’s the thing about language though… It changes, all the time. The word fuck itself used to mean “to hit/strike”. Do we then say that it’s always invoking violence if used in a sexual way? Almost never, really, but yes in this meme’s case that much older connotation is somewhat being referenced (though almost no one thinks about that consciously, therefore that meaning simply isn’t there in many folk’s minds).

              But the word fuck is used in so many different ways there literally are books and documentaries on that single word. Most of the uses have nothing to do with violence. Most are probably not even sexual.

              If I said “that woman sucks!” Am I accusing her of being a fellating hussy? Almost never would that be close to how that phrase is used. But that’s almost certainly what it would’ve meant originally.

              The word cunt is another example. No one calls another person a cunt to say “you are a vulva and that is bad”. It means a variety of things regionally but almost never anything about genitals these days.

              This conversation reminds me of my mom lecturing me about calling my brother a son of a bitch (I had literally no idea what it meant and was like 8). She told me I was calling her a female dog. No, Mom, not only did I not know what I was actually saying, it hasn’t meant that for a very long time.

              • graymess@lemmy.world
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                8 months ago

                Damn. I guess you’re right.

                Except the meme we’re talking about is depicting a literal butt fucking, so I don’t know what you’re arguing. Clearly any of the alternate meanings of “fuck” are not so detached from what I’ve been saying this whole time or the meme wouldn’t make sense.

                • TrickDacy@lemmy.world
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                  8 months ago

                  Ideas represented graphically aren’t typically meant to be taken literally. They could’ve written “they are fuckin ya” but that would not be funny. Nor would it have fit the format of the meme.

                  Which it actually was chuckle worthy despite this thread.

                  • graymess@lemmy.world
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                    8 months ago

                    Getting tired of engaging with this. The point is at least two people who saw the meme interpreted it as harmful representation and felt strongly enough about it to respond. You don’t have to agree or even take action. Nobody requested the post be deleted or censored.

                    You could acknowledge the perspective of someone with a different lived experience, consider it or don’t, and move on. Or you could do what you’ve chosen to do and deny that perspective and try to shut it up.